A postcard.

It's been a crazy couple of months. I moved from my convenient, midtown apartment onto a couch in Queens, which was 75 minutes away from my job. So when my boss asked me to work at 5, my alarm was set for a lovely 3am. I learned to nap on the train, so it all worked out in the end.

Currently, I'm subletting from a friend in Manhattan (I love Manhattan. A BUNCH.) so it's been lovely to be back, and only 19 minutes away from work! I'm enjoying having time to just explore the city, and hang out with friends... Movies in Bryant Park, book festivals, late night dinners, watching the Tony's from the TKTS steps in Time's Square, reading much and laughing often. Summer in New York has quickly become one of my favorite things, even though it's hot and humid outside.

I'm looking forward to this upcoming year, which will be my first as a "grown up," being that I don't have school. Cannot wait.

Sorry this post isn't nearly as eloquent as those before, but I figured you all were more than due an update.

Much love from Manhattan. :)

Molls

P.S. I also got bangs.

Standing on the top of the world.

My life is currently a big ball of uncomfortable. I hate saying goodbye to people, and this weekend has had an abundance of goodbyes. I’m saying goodbye to friends from school, and I’m leaping without much assurance that I’ll land on my feet. I’ve got a place to crash right now, but I’m still needing to find some longer term housing. I’m saying goodbye to my roommates soon, and even though she just arrived to help me move/pack, I’ll be saying goodbye to my mom on Monday. I'd be very happy to keep her with me forever, thank you.

There are moments where all I want to do is go back to being a kid and not having to think about things like rent and bills and jobs.

I said goodbye to the ESB tonight in the best way that I know how- by venturing from her dungeons to the top observation deck. It was breathtaking, and I got to experience it with one of my favorite people {mom}. This doesn’t have much of a point, except to share EACH step of my journey.

Here I am, breathing, taking this whole thing one step at a time.

English is a funny little language.

I watched the sunrise this morning.
I say this with some laughter, because the sun didn’t really rise, per say... The best description I can think of is that the sky became a little less grey, and a little more blue. The clouds continued to drizzle, and I continued to stand there with a pink blanket around my shoulders until I figured that it couldn’t get any bluer outside, and decided to return to my 8th floor lair.

I was reminded of something quite important that my pastor talked about last night in church.

God never fails.

This is a truth that is fundamental to our entire belief system as Christians, and yet sometimes it’s difficult to see. We all find ourselves standing in a dark place, and even the strongest of us, those reliant on the belief that God does NOT fail, are left asking, “God, have you failed me?”

I stood on the roof this morning. All by myself, me and my God. I was waiting for his sun to rise. And you know what? I didn’t see it. But does that mean that the sun didn’t rise? Of course not.
The fact that I could see anything at all was evidence that the sun was there. Not only did I believe that the sun had risen, I KNEW that it had. I know that each sunrise represents a new day. I know that without sunlight, even in the slightest form, I would have all consuming darkness.
I did not stand in darkness and drizzle this morning. I stood in rain, and I stood in light. It didn’t look like a post card, and to some people, it probably looked like I was standing in the pit of hell. But God was there, and even when I couldn’t see it clearly, or hardly at all, the evidence was clear:

God never fails. His sun has risen. His son has risen.

Little did I know, this was just the beginning.

Coming to The King's College was a big step for me. I moved 730 miles away from my family and friends, to the middle of New York City, knowing no one.  I knew that God had called me here, and that because He wanted me to be here, He would make it happen. Finances, flights, everything. I had peace about my decision, and was willing to follow God's plan, knowing that he would give me a life that would not be disappointing. A life of abundance, and a world of joy.

This year at King's has challenged me, and through challenges, I've grown. I learned though friendships, I learned about myself, and I worked on coming to a place where God was everything I needed, and that my security is in my God, not in my self, or my city, or my friends. I'm not saying that I'm perfect at this, or that I'm finished learning by any means; I'm just noticing the growth.

I am not returning to The King's College next year.



I'll let that sink in for a moment.



I'm not returning, but I have a very good reason why: God has something even better. Better than New York, better than King's, better book publishing.

I'm going to be a pastor, and the reason that I'm not coming back to King's, is that I am going to work for a year, and (prayerfully!) attend the Hillsong School of Leadership in July of 2013. Hillsong is in Sydney. Sydney is in Australia.

That's right, I'm quitting King's, working for a year, and moving to Australia to become a pastor.

And you know what?


I am so excited.


I am also overcome with peace and confirmation about this, and I hope that you will stand with me. This is a big step, even bigger than my original "atmospheric leap." I am leaving my country behind, to go after the heart of my Jesus, who died and rose again. Much of the world celebrated that today- on Easter. Today was beautiful.

 I honestly believe that this is God's plan for my life, and could not be more excited, which gives me even further confidence that this is God- who knew I'd ever be okay with moving from New York? But Sydney... Sydney! I can't wait!


 "Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."  -Matthew 11:28-30

My life is just beginning. I cannot wait.